As we approach Christmas….the word Forgiveness comes to mind and settles deeply to rest at the bottom of my heart.
My family have treated me very badly this year, and I have suffered hugely from it, as those close to me know only too well. From a supposedly close family, being told your father died via a text message is simply not acceptable.
A few weeks after my Father died our home was flooded; it’s been a trying year. People I care deeply about had great loss, and many of us suffered emotional trauma through the storms.
Reading on Facebook that your family has been together in an apartment for 4 days before releasing your father’s ashes into the waves of Bondi Beach, that you were not even told about or given a choice to attend is not acceptable.
Having your Mother drive past your home twice, when you haven’t seen her in almost a year, and you ask here to let you know when she is available, as she is staying only 40 mins away, and you would happily travel to her just for a 10 minute cuddle, and catch up, and you are not even contacted, is not acceptable.
Knowing your whole family is in New Zealand having Christmas together without you, and they are not talking to you, no explanations for the silent treatment you are getting, is deeply painful.
One thing I am learning to accept is that life becomes much easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got.
So I am going into the festive season with forgiveness in my heart, and I am going to accept the apologies I never got, so I can move on and feel freedom, and joy again.
Mark and I will be on the move again; looking for a new home in the New Year as were we are is under development very soon.
For those friends and cousins that have supported, loved and held me this year, I am eternally grateful.
If people are so damaged they cannot communicate honestly, speak their truth or be authentic, I say a prayer for you, as I only have honest relationships in my life.
I cannot imagine what it would be like to live in a world of lies, cheating, deceit and a web spun so erratically that dysfunction shines bright for all to see.
I know the Truth of my being, I live in Love, and I walk in Beauty
I know no shame, I walk proudly, and tread gently on this sacred Earth.
Today I accept the apology I never got.
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